Before you die
by ThatFangirlHybridSuperhero
Summary: When Natasha is fatally wounded in a battle, she doesn't see her life flash before her (she'd have to remember it all for that!) instead, everything's put into perspective. It's better than the summary and a quick read.


**This is incredibly dark for me and I don't even know where it came from because I'm in a great mood. It's a short one shot that will hopefully give feels of the angsty kind. I hope you guys like it! Review and stuff, because if you guys like this, I can do more of this stuff. :) **

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They say before you die your life flashes before your eyes, 7 seconds seems like forever, the entirety of your being played out in front of you. Mistakes, happiness, all of it.

But that's not the truth.

Before you die you see the world around you change. What seemed like a war zone seconds before with guns and arrows and blood is now different. You see the trees and the leaves, the flowers. The sky is no longer just grey and the rain is no longer just water. All those things you took for granted are suddenly important.

Before you die you realise that blood is never just blood. Blood is life but it is also death. When you laughed days earlier about cutting your finger on paper, noticing how pathetic that sounds. Blood can be different colours too, even though it is always red red red... The red is always different and by this time you have realised that there is no coming back from this red. There's too much, it's too dark and that life has been spilt.

Before you die you see the one who predicted your death, foretold your demise. He's not laughing now. Loki. He's frowning, unable to understand. Because he did not see your death then and there, it was suppose to be another time, another place. Not now. _Drakovs daughter. The hospital fire._ It doesn't matter anymore because it's all just death.

Before you die you see a soldier. He's lost so much and he doesn't realise what he's about to lose. He's your friend. _ Steve_, you think,_ I'm sorry._ Because you're sorry he has to see you when you're dead, you don't want that for him again. But apologies don't matter when you're dead.

Before you die you see the man behind the suit. You've know him a long time now but he's not always known you. Then he sees you on the ground and his mask comes away. You see Tony...and he's saying something (shouting)._ Help her, she's down!_ He doesn't run to help because he knows it's all too late.

Before you die you see something ironic. You see a god. Not the God. He doesn't exist. If he did, you would have been dead a long while ago. He doesn't see you, he's too busy smiling because you'd won. He doesn't realise you're not going to be around to celebrate later that night or team up in battle again. Maybe it's better this way because in a few seconds his smile will be gone again (like after Loki died) and it may never return.

Before you die you see the hulk. But it's Bruce and not the monster. He's seen it all and he's on his knees and when you look again you're certain you see tears. It's too late for Banner to be free of the green monster and to help. Nobody can help.

Before you die you see the face of the person you never though you could trust all those years ago, when he held an arrow to your head, _come with me_, he said,_ I don't want to kill you._ Now it's different. It's not come with me, it's _stay with me_. He's yelling at you because you don't say anything, don't even move. It's not I don't want to kill you, it's _ I don't want you to die_. You never told him how much he meant to you and that's your deepest regret because everything else with Clint has been perfect. The red from your ledger is dripping, dripping onto Clint who is covered in red, desperately trying to stop it from flowing. But once it starts, it cannot stop.

The sight goes first. You're pitched into darkness, the last faces you see make you want to smile because they're the only family you've ever had. Or at least remembered having.

The last thing you hear before you die is not I love you - he says that the instance before - it's something much less cliched yet just as meaningful.

_I'll carry on_, he tells you. That's exactly what you wanted to hear. No I love you's, just the knowledge that Clint will carry on is enough. Then you're smiling. He says something else too, but by this time you can't hear the words, just his voice.

The final thing you feel is his lips on yours.

Then in a second even all that is gone. The blood. The trees. Tony. Steve. Thor. Bruce. Even Clint.

All that remains is light because the red is gone from your ledger and you're in a place where everything is good, a place you never imagined you would end up.

Heaven is white. Hell is red, like fire, like your hair. The only red in heaven is your hair. And that makes everything right...

Because you're Natasha Romanoff. The Black Widow. Natasha, Nat, Tasha, and even after death, you need a little red in your life.

End.


End file.
